Writing became one of the most precious gifts to me at 8 years-old. To this day, it is my chosen mode of communicating.
For the last few weeks, I've felt a stirring to sit down and write. It's the feeling of a million things I want to say but not quite knowing how to say them.
Getting words down on a piece of paper (or typing them on a screen) have been one of the most healing and redemptive practices for me. It is a safe, sacred space even if those words go out all over the internet for 5 people to read.
There's something about releasing the words into the wild that are a part of the process that I can't skip through. Sure, there are plenty of things in my journal that may never see the light of day and I realize that's okay, but then there are some things that are meant to be released into the great wide open internet because it's an important step in the process. It could even be that it's vital, necessary, and a missing puzzle piece.
The words may come out shaky and wobbly like a newborn animal trying to figure out how to use his/her legs, but starting and taking those first steps are a part of the process of learning how to walk. How can I learn to run if I am too afraid to take the first wobbly steps? The shaky, wobbly steps prepare me for the sure, sturdy steps ahead. The first steps are the hardest and also most vulnerable, but the first wobbly steps are needed. In fact, what if the first wobbly steps taken propel another human in the world to take his/her own wobbly steps, too? That would make all of those shaky steps worth it, knowing that it was those uneasy, unnerving steps that ignited something in someone else to take a step forward, too.
Consider this the moment that was being searched for as a sign or gentle nudge to take the shaky, wobbly steps forward. Whatever has stood in the way, consider this the moment that those roadblocks have been pushed aside. That the path has been made clear for the first shaky, wobbly step to be taken. Everyone has to take a step at some point.
May this be the moment.
Step forward even if its shaky and wobbly.